Tag: sports

Playing Pretend

May 26, 2020 / Jason Lalonde

Life is full of games.

Funny forms of entertainment meant to pass the time and bring people together.

But what is a game?

Game: a structured form of play, usually undertaken for entertainment or fun, and sometimes used as an educational tool.
wikipedia

Is this definition an oversized paint brush?

Because it’s making some broad strokes.

A game can be anything.

The key word in this definition is structure.

But what is structure?

When we think of games, some of us think of sports. Soccer is a game. The structure of soccer being the rules you follow such as “don’t touch the ball with your hands.”

Says who?

You can totally touch the ball with your hands if you wanted to. No one is physically stopping you. The only consequence is a guy in a terrible shirt and tight shorts aggressively shoving multicolored cards in your face.

That’s it.

Like that’s supposed to scare you.

Go ahead and grab that ball and walk it right into the goal, punching and dropkicking everyone that gets in your way.

And then you win.

Soccer’s easy.

Why doesn’t everyone do that?

Because then it wouldn’t be soccer, right? I mean, make the ball an oval and that’s just rugby.

But rugby has rules too. You aren’t allowed to pass the ball forward. You can’t go outside the lines. Rugby games only last around 80 minutes.

But all these rules seem arbitrary. Why not pass the ball forward. If you want to avoid a defender, run all the way to the next town with the ball. Say hi to the folks while you’re at it. When that ugly shirt guy blows his whistle, flip him the bird and keep playing. You don’t lose the ability to play rugby after 80 minutes.

You don’t lose the ability of your grasping appendages when you play soccer. You don’t have to cut off your arms.

Why do we follow these rules?

Because structure defines a game and makes it fun. When we walk onto the soccer pitch, we enter a new world, a world where hands are bad and balls behind nets are our currency.

We agree to this new world’s rules with a common goal to compete and have fun.

But none of it is real.

The point I’m trying to make is that games are pretend.

Make-believe.

Fantasy.

Role-playing.

When you play soccer, you pretend to be a guy who can’t use his hands and is obsessed with balls and nets.

Soccer is a role-playing game.

In this sense, every sport is a role-playing game.

Every game is a role-playing game.

I’d argue every form of entertainment is a role-playing game.

Music. Literature. Art. Performance Art. Theatre. Cinema. Dance. The Circus. Magic. Parades.

You name it.

All these have rules to follow and roles to assume.

That role is often audience members suspending their disbelief.

It’s all make-believe.

And it’s all fun.

We pretend because it’s fun.

Ask any child playing house.

Playing pretend is fun.

Scrum

May 1, 2020 / Jason Lalonde

My brother and I had a conversation yesterday about sports, specifically which is the hardest sport. I immediately said ice hockey. Matt said water polo.

We realized that both are difficult in their own way. We had some other contenders: Rugby, Tennis, Boxing, MMA.

I still think there is no comparison to ice hockey.

I’ve never played ice hockey, but I’ve played roller hockey and I’ve skated on ice.

The technical proficiency required in hockey is tremendous. Imagine trying to skate on razor blades while five other players are looking to take your head off.

And on top of that, while you’re skating and handling a small rubber disk with a stick, you also need to know how to fight.

Fighting is almost always involved in hockey.

It’s technically prohibited, and penalties are enforced, but when the gloves drop officials let it happen.

Ice hockey is basically rugby on ice with a boxing match every now and then.

And if you think skating while being head hunted is hard, try swimming. There’s a reason we don’t have fins. We aren’t meant for the water.

Water polo is basically rugby in water.

Matt and I realized that our definition of difficult sports revolved around rugby. I think this is because the idea of rugby is scary.

I believe rugby was the first difficult sport and all other difficult sports derived from rugby. I have nothing to back this up. I just like to imagine it this way.

Bleacher Report ranked the toughest sports. They ranked each sport based on their difficulty in 6 categories: endurance, speed, strength, agility, skill, physicality.

According to Bleacher Report, ice hockey is the 5^th hardest sport. Rugby, boxing, and Aussie rules rugby, also known as footy by Australians, place 4^th, 3^rd, and 2^nd respectively. The distinction made between rugby and footy was interesting. Besides rugby there were three other rugby related sports in the top ten: Gaelic football, hurling, and footy placing 10^th, 7^th, and 2^nd. American football, which I always thought came from rugby, was also included placing 6^th. It seems the only sports having nothing to do with rugby on this list are gymnastics, basketball, and boxing which placed 9^th, 8^th, and 3^rd respectively.

What’s the hardest sport?

Water polo.

Aka rugby in water.

It seems the hardest sports are just different forms of rugby.

New Shoes

April 30, 2020 / Jason Lalonde

Books? Check

Aruarian Dance? Check

Rowing? Check

Animation? Check

I guess it’s time to talk about Esports.

“Esports? What are Esports? Sports for the letter E?”

No no no my conveniently uninformed friend.

Letters don’t have legs.

But then again, they wouldn’t need legs to play Esports.

And that’s the whole problem, innit?

Why did I just go British?

“Oi mate, Esports is just a buncha wankers playing the telly, innit? What happened to blokes playing the beautiful game on the pitch?”

Esports: A form of sport competition using video games.
Google definition

“That’s bonkers, that is.”

You’ve either never heard of this or you’re rolling your eyes at the slight mention of the word or, on the off chance this blog has more readers than I thought, you’re a fan of Esports.

Or you don’t care.

In which case, fair.

But let me tell you where I stand.

I am involved in an 8-year long bet. In 2018, I bet one of my friends $1,000 that Esports would be in the Olympics by 2026.

“Youse a bit daft, mate.”

No, I am not daft my tea drinking friend.

I am just proud and stubborn.

Before you go off telling your mates how much of a wanker I am, let me tell you why I am confident enough to bet $1,000 on this topic.

“1,000 quid? Blimey! You got yourself in a proper jammy, bruv.”

Moving on.

The idea of Esports is controversial due to the different interpretations of the word sport. The definition of sport, however, has been argued long before video games.

Sport: an activity involving physical exertion and skill in which an individual or team competes against another or others for entertainment.
Google definition

This Google definition is terribly written by the way.

Wikipedia also defines sport as:

All forms of competitive physical activity or games which, through casual or organized participation, at least in part aim to use, maintain or improve physical ability and skills while providing enjoyment to participants, and in some cases, entertainment for spectators.
Sports wikipedia page

Now, as you might have already assumed, I don’t agree with the two definitions above. I think Esports are sports. It’s in the name, so I assume most Esports fans think so too.

But I get why this is controversial. Esports do not require physical activity or exertion.

I still think they’re sports.

But I am not here to argue about what is and isn’t a sport. I’ll admit, sports are generally physical. I’m not trying to convince you otherwise. I’m not trying to take anything away from the sacred word that is sport. A word that defines peak athleticism and camaraderie. Hoorah!

But, just like video games, sports don’t really matter. In this sense, they are both the same. At the end of the day, they’re just games.

But let me tell you why Esports will be in the Olympics by 2026.

The IOC (International Olympic Committee) is in charge of regulating and admitting sports into the Olympics. The IOC has changed its definition of sport over the years. The first Olympic games in 1896 held 43 events. The 2021 Summer Olympics will hold 339 events. Due to the overwhelming popularity of the games, everyone and their uncle wants their made-up sport to be included.

This is not satire.

Shuffleboard on ice is in the Olympics.

And don’t try to tell me curling is a serious sport for serious people.

The idea of curling could only be realized between 4 bored and cold drunks with a few big rocks and a broom.

“Dude, yeah this is totally a sport. This should be in the Olympics, man.”

The IOC has a specific process in picking sports. They have developed seven criteria to judge whether a sport be included. They are as follows:

History and tradition of the sport.
Universality.
Popularity of the sport.
Image.
Athletes’ health.
Development of the International Federation that governs the sport.
Costs of holding the sport.

What does the IOC define as a sport?

All events sanctioned by an international sport federation, a definition that may differ from the common meaning of the word “sport.”
Olympic sports Wikipedia page

The Global Association of International Sports Federations (GAISF), formerly SportAccord, defines a sport with the following 4 criteria:

Have an element of competition.
Be in no way harmful to any living creature.
Not rely on equipment provided by a single supplier (excluding proprietary games such as arena football).
Not rely on any “luck” element specifically designed into the sport.

Esports qualifies with the GAISF criteria.

Competition? Check.

Harming creatures? Nope.

Single supplier? Technically no.

Luck? Depends on the game.

Esports also qualifies with the IOC criteria.

While universality, image, and athlete health are debatable, the following facts about Esports cannot be denied:

The first Esports competition was in 1972. It was a game called Spacewar and it took place at Stanford University. This gives it a rich 48-year history.

This year, Esports have 495 million viewers worldwide. Global revenue surpassed $1 billion. Esports are popular.

The International Esports Federation (IESF), founded in South Korea, has 56 member nations. Its mission is to have Esports recognized as a legitimate sport.

With these facts, I’ll let you come to your own conclusion.

Will I be $1,000 richer?

As of right now, the IOC does not recognize IESF as a legitimate sports federation, despite it qualifying the IOC’s criteria.

But that’s not to say they haven’t considered it.

In the 2018 Winter Olympics, there was a showcase of popular Esport Star Craft II. Five South Korean Esports athletes were part of the Olympic torch relay. Star Craft II wasn’t technically in the Olympics as they were competing for prize money, not medals.

The 2021 Olympics in Tokyo will also showcase Esports. They will also be competing for prize money.

It seems the IOC is interested but hesitant.

Here’s the most recent development on the topic:

“The organization committee for the 2024 Summer Olympics in Paris were in discussions with the IOC and the various professional Esport organizations to consider esports for the event, citing the need to include these elements to keep the Olympics relevant to younger generations.”
Esports Wikipedia Page

I could do a lot with $1,000.

New gaming computer? Some nice headphones? Aruarian Dance on vinyl?

But I think I’ll start with some new shoes.

Big Word: Immunocompromised

April 17, 2020 / Jason Lalonde

In the sports section of the Los Angeles Times this morning, there’s an article about Baylor basketball player Lauren Cox. The title reads, “Cox pursues WNBA dreams despite diabetes.” The article goes on, “After being diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes at 7 years old, Cox is prepared to realize a lifelong dream in Friday’s WNBA draft.”

I have Type 1 diabetes. I was a Division 1 college athlete. I have an enormous amount of respect for Lauren Cox. She’s competing while managing blood sugar. I can’t begin to describe how difficult that is. Not only is she good enough to compete at the highest level, but she “could go as high as No. 2 to her hometown Dallas Wings.”

Diabetes is an autoimmune disease that affects the pancreas. The pancreas is an organ that produces insulin. Insulin is a hormone that helps regulate blood sugar. Without insulin, your body cannot use sugar. Sugar is energy. Competing as a college athlete while manually regulating your energy levels is not easy. The equivalent would be taking a calculus test without a calculator; cycling without gears or better yet having to manually move your bike chains each time you wanted to switch gears; driving in the Indy 500 without a pit crew. That last one might be a tad extreme, but the point stands: it’s not automatic anymore. The small details everyone takes for granted are now your entire life. Your body’s energy is at risk of human error, aka inevitable error. If you make a mistake, you create a deficit, a disadvantage large enough to make most people quit.

The difference between myself and Lauren Cox is sheer willpower, her’s being greater than mine. She is a beast that should be recognized. I was not as good. I was on the Men’s Rowing team at Santa Clara University. My personal best was that I made Junior Varsity and I medaled in a few events. That’s not to say I wasn’t proud of that accomplishment. I worked hard.

But Lauren worked harder. That’s a fact.

Stories such as Lauren’s are inspiring and there are other athletes with diabetes.

Former Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler was diagnosed at the age of 25. Cutler played in the NFL for 12 seasons, 9 with diabetes. Mountain climber Will Cross was diagnosed in 1976 at the age of 9. Cross has climbed the highest peak on all 7 continents. Atlanta Braves baseball player Adam Duvall was diagnosed in 2012 at the age of 24. He was diagnosed 2 years before starting his Major League Baseball career. Antonia Göransson is a Swedish soccer player who is quoted as “a fast and skillful winger, (that) can strike the ball equally well with either foot.” She was meant to play for Seattle Reign FC. A week before leaving for the United States, she was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes. She didn’t go to the United States. The set back didn’t phase her. She continues to dominate in Sweden as a formidable winger. Sara Groenewegen is a professional Canadian softball pitcher. She’s lived with Type 1 diabetes since she was 9. In July 2018, 4 years into her professional softball career, Groenewegen was diagnosed with Legionnaire’s disease, a severe form of pneumonia. She spent a week in an induced coma. She recovered quickly. She brushed off Legionnaire’s and continued to compete as one of the best softball pitchers’ in the country. All with diabetes.

Sara Groenewegen is a beast.

All these athletes are inspiring, but I can’t talk about diabetic athletes without talking about one of the greatest athletes to ever live: Sir Steve Redgrave. Redgrave is a retired British rower and is the most successful male rower in Olympic history. And he has diabetes. Saying he was a diabetic Olympic athlete isn’t enough. He was diagnosed after winning 4 consecutive Olympic Gold medals. After winning the 4^th medal, the 1996 Gold Medal in Atlanta, Georgia, Redgrave said, “If anyone sees me go near a boat, you’ve got my permission to shoot me.” He took a 4-month break. In 1997, Redgrave was diagnosed with diabetes. In 2000, he won his fifth consecutive Olympic Gold Medal in Sydney, Australia.

But that still doesn’t do Redgrave justice. Because he wasn’t diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes. He was diagnosed with Type 2.

Type 1 diabetes is autoimmune. Your immune system attacks your pancreas decreasing the insulin your body produces. Type 2 diabetes has to do with how your body responds to insulin. It often has to do with nutrition. Most cases of Type 2 diabetes involve unhealthy diets and obesity. You eat so much sugar that your pancreas is unable to process it. A common misconception is that this is the only cause of Type 2 diabetes, so it often has a negative connotation. Type 2 has less to do with diet and more to do with the body processing sugar incorrectly. This can be caused by diet, but it can also be genetic.

Think of insulin as a key. A key that unlocks sugar. Type 1 diabetics don’t have the key. Type 2 diabetics have a broken key.

Steve Redgrave has a broken key.

There’s something socially screwed up about Type 2 diabetes. When I was diagnosed, I was told originally that I had Type 2. I didn’t take this news well. But later, my doctor told me they made a mistake. I didn’t have Type 2. I had Type 1. I was relieved.

Type 2 can be cured. Type 1 is for life.

Why was I relieved when I had been given a life sentence of regulating blood sugar and not being able to eat a banana without counting its carbs?

Because it was more socially acceptable. Type 2 has the stereotype of unattractive, lazy, and fat. I didn’t want that. I was 17 when I was diagnosed. I was insecure. My teenage self would rather have the life threatening, incurable disease. That’s because of the shame we put on Type 2 diabetes.

That’s messed up.

And Steve Redgrave was told he had this disease a year after he won his 4^th consecutive Olympic gold medal.

Imagine you’re the best at something. Like the best. Do you understand? No one is better than you and everyone knows it. And after you prove you’re the best, you tell everyone you’re retiring. You want to retire on top. A year later, you’re diagnosed with a disease that’s associated with being fat and lazy. Everyone says you have washed up, and quickly at that. You’re told you couldn’t compete again even if you wanted to.

You look Type 2 diabetes in the face.

You say, “Watch me.”

Against all odds you win your fifth consecutive Olympic gold medal, placing you as the most successful male Olympic rower in history.

You prove everyone wrong. You’re still the best and now if someone wanted to take your throne, they’d have to do it with a life-threatening, fat shaming disease.

A year after his final Olympic games, Redgrave was knighted for “services to Rowing.” He is now Sir Steve Redgrave.

If you want to know more about Redgrave and his training for his fifth gold medal, watch the BBC documentary Gold Fever. It shows Redgrave training in the years leading up to the Sydney Olympics with his boat mates Matthew Pinsent, Tim Foster, and James Cracknell. It is inspiring.

Steve Redgrave is a beast

As for Lauren Cox, I’ll be rooting for her when we finally get out of quarantine. I’m sure she’ll tear up the court.

I mean, she’s in the company of Sir Steve Redgrave.

Lauren Cox is a beast.

Tag: sports

Playing Pretend

Scrum

New Shoes

Big Word: Immunocompromised

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